Thursday, January 7, 2010

Do you think I am easier to be played on than a pipe?


Now when I was a young woman, I had a good Irish temper. I could go at it pretty good in certain circumstances. But that has mellowed considerably over the years. The person I probably argued with the most was my husband—surprise, surprise. It’s usually the person you love who can push your buttons. And, of course, my daughter and I had a very stormy several years. [Thank God they’re over!!!]

Then I got Fibromyalgia—and I noticed how much stress triggered flare-ups. So, I learned to let things roll off my back. [Therapy when my daughter was 16 and pregnant helped.] Let’s face it, most stuff really isn’t worth freaking out about. You go all ballistic, ruin your day—and everyone’s around you—but what does it really accomplish. And now, I’ve gone through so much crap in my life that I just don’t have the wherewithal to argue. And that may be causing problems of a different sort…

I committed to directing this current play last January—and a lot has gone down since then. The main one being my knee injury. I thought I’d be in better physical shape by now and wouldn’t be so hampered when it comes to doing stuff for the set. I was wrong. It’s frustrating me, but I’m trying to let it go. I’m also trying to let certain other pressures not get to me. And it’s not easy….

I am a classic middle child [Marcia, Marcia, Marcia]—I always try to make everyone else happy, I try to keep the peace…

The theatre group I work with—like most arts organizations right now—is in a real money crunch. Unlike many arts organizations, we do not get grants or government funding. We rely solely on ticket sales. So, the powers-that-be tried some extra programming over the holiday season to generate additional revenue. It was fairly successful, which I’m happy about. But it really limited what I could do on the technical end of things. This is where my middle-childness comes in. I’ve just sucked it up and tried to keep focused. And as a result, I think I got taken advantage of. And I’m not happy about that.

I have to learn how to be more assertive—that’s one of the many things I admire about my daughter. She doesn’t take any crap from anybody; all 5’2’’/105 lbs. of her will stand toe-to-toe with anyone. I have no idea where this came from, but damn I admire her for it.

Guess I was taking that whole “the meek shall inherit the earth” thing too literally.

6 comments:

  1. 'classic middle child'...oh me too.

    Well, stand up and don't let them push you around.

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  2. I am the oldest child and I too have "people-pleasing" problems. Yes you need to take the example of your daughter and stand up for yourself. Good luck
    Hugs
    SueAnn

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  3. I'm seriously lacking the people pleasing problem. I'll fight for what I think is right, and lord help who gets in my way.

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  4. You need to figure out how to pick your battles. Sometimes you need to stand up for yourself, unfortunatley you can't let everything roll of your back or people will trample you!

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  5. I'm a classic oldest child, so I totally get you on this!

    And about accents, if your good at them, I say go right ahead. It's the people who are terrible and inconsistent and just make weird noises in an attempt to establish themselves as someone else who I can't stand!

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  6. Lora--I cringe every year on St. Patty's Day at the bad Irish brogues. My grandfather was from County Mayo, so I come by that one genetically. Hope your class went well. My show opens tonight, so I'm a bit tense today...

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