Thursday, January 28, 2010

"Come, let's away to prison; We two alone will sing like birds I' th' cage."

Just thought I’d put it out there that my retirement plan is prison…..

Others have suggested cruise ships and my one friend thought a coma would be good cause you’d be well rested. I said it would have to be the soap opera coma where they come in and do your hair and makeup every day….

Think about it though. Prison has certain advantages—3 hots and a cot. Free healthcare, access to a gym.


I’d finally get to take some college courses. All on the taxpayers dime. So I become somebody’s bitch… oh well.

Now I just have to figure out what kind of crime will get me in a Martha Stewart type of lock up—and for how long…..

Planning ahead is a bitch.


  1. ROFL!! You could embezzle some money from somewhere...that would be a good white collar imprisonment charge!?! LOL!!
    Good luck on your planning!

  2. We're planning on chinese cat food.

  3. Sue Ann--
    actually--the CFO at the last job I had embezzeled 1.1 mil from a non-prof theatre company!! And only got 4 years.

    She jeopardized our pensions and Social Security and only got 4 years--so she could buy $725.00 Chanel shoes, $1,500.00 bilinis and go on trips to Martinique.

  4. Didn't Martha go in for insider stock trading? Although she wasn't in long enough for a retirement, just a little vacation.